|Why is it that parents are more accepting of gay daughters than gay sons?|
I have a couple of lesbian friends that refuse to believe that their sons are gay, and they cleary are, or they will avoid it completely, but will be very accepting of gay daughters. I want to tell one of my friends so bad that her son is gay, but she knows; we just don't touch on the subject. I find this true about my straight friends too. Not just friends but in general.
Tell me what you all think.
|Because of the prevelant gender hierachy inherent in society today: This stipulates different degrees of masculinity and femininity, with the dominant hegemonic masculinity centered on heterosexuality at the top and homosexual masculinity at the bottom. Heterosexual masculinity is perceived as being the norm. But what constitutes normality is socially defined. If all guyren were told that homosexuality was okay and heterosexuality was wrong then that would be the norm! Homosexual masculinity in a culture of hegemonic masculinity is seen as more feminine and less of a ‘real man’. But this is rubbish because sexual identity should be distinguished from biological sex, since being gay doesn’t make me less of a man anatomically or biologically. Sexual identity needs to break free from gender identity, since same-sex interest/activity does not violate male or female identities i.e. you can be gay and still be a ‘real man’ (whatever that is?!). But hegemonic masculinity still sees subordinate masculinities as threatening to the gender order/hierarchy and its power relations/dominance. To uphold masculinity you need to constantly ward of threats to it like femininity and homosexuality. The key to male dominance is heterosexual assertion. Homosexuality needs to be marginalized and vilified, so that male dominance is upheld: it boils down to the fragility of male identity. Problem is many homosexuals reject the stereotypes imposed upon them and cannot therefore be stigmatized. There is no hegemonic femininity in society...therefore male homosexuality is worse because it challenges the very sexual norm of society and the gender hierachy i.e. heterosexual and hegemonic masculinity which underlines much of our culture...no hegemonic femininity does this...|
|How do "Quiverfull" families deal with the gay sons they are making?|
I know there is no accepted understanding of the mechanism of the well-documented fraternal birth order effect on male sexual orientation, but I'm worried about the Quiverfull movement's treatment of the gay sons that they are more likely to have than the rest of us.
How does that movement, which promotes the spread of fundamentalist Christianity via superior breeding power (quantity, not quality) justify their increased likelihood to have gay guys who, I imagine, they might be more likely to emotionally or physically abuse?
|they probably are going to try to "preach" ( or beat) the gay out of them|
|Are a lot of dads unaccepting of gay sons?|
Why are people surprised when a father automatically accepts that his son is gay? Or that he has no problem with it as soon as he finds out? Are a lot of dads not ok with it at first?
I found out my son was gay and asked a question on here about how to get him to come out. A lot of people were surprised I was fine with it, why is that?
|If you only knew half the stories that I was told by some of these people; stories that would truly haunt you.|
The short answer is, people are cruel, men are raised to be the epitome of masculinity and solid alpha testosterone, anything but is automatically frowned upon and labeled deviant. I'm not saying all straight men are like this but a good amount are. My dad was also the exception, he was cool with my being gay at least to my face. We had a great relationship growing up. Not everyone had the same luxury as I did.
|Why do manly men not want their sons to be gay?|
is it, they believe in masculinity and to have their son gay would be shameful?
|Good question first off, I think it is because manly men want their son to be just as manly as he is. a son to do things that will make dad proud.most manly probably think about the gay stereotype: is that their sons wont be manly at all and they will float around doing their gay stuff.|
short answer: Manly men want a son to be just like them, like father like son
|Are gay parents more likely to have gay sons and daughters?|
i mean, is it passed hereditary ? if a gay man had sex with a woman and she had a guy, would that guy be more likely to be gay ? personally, i don't believe it is hereditary... but i believe it is caused by conditions in the mother's womb.
|Unquestionably, people are born homosexual, and of course your supposition that gay parents would produce gay guyren is absurd. Scientists still don't know why a person is born this way, but there has been some research which suggests that it can be caused in the mother's womb.|
I'm not trying to convince anyone that this is a fact. It's just one of the many theories regarding homosexuality. I've included an article regarding this issue if any of you are interested in checking it out.
|Why do some parents stop loving their sons after they discover their sons are gay?|
One of my best friends, who has came out of closet 5 years ago, has received a lot of personal attacks because he is gay. I am very sympatheirc towards him. As a straight guy, I believe equality among all people irrespective of their sexuality. His parents said they will never talk to him again . There has been 5 years and his parents still behave the same way
I feel very sad. Why do some parents love their son conditionally?
|They're mean, shallow people. Of course, to go into the many reasons why they may be against gay people, including potential personal circumstances would be extremely counterproductive because the length of the answer would prevent you from reading it.|
|Do you think absent fathers produce gay sons?|
Psychological research has shown that absent fathers will produce longing in their sons for male presence and father figure that may become sexualised later.
|Please post a link to the piece of research. I find this very hard to believe, but if there is compelling evidence to the contrary I will of course revise my opinion.|
|Can homophobic parents understand their gay sons ? Why / why not?|
why do some parents claim that they love / understand their gay sons while they always verbally abuse their gay sons?
|You know this is a good question. When I was 17 in my junior year of high school I came out to everyone I knew and told them I was gay. I lost all my friends and my parents never accepted me for who I was saying they were not going to have a gay son and that if I was going to be gay I would have to leave their house. Of course I was worried and scared for myself at the time so I lied to them and said it was all a joke and that I was guyding even though I was not.|
Well here I am now 22 years old and about a month and a half ago I came out to my new group of friends and to my parents again. My group of friends all accepted me and said they had no problems with me being gay. My mom accepted me saying she was ok and proud to have a gay son and that she wishes she would have thought differently back when I was 17. Dad accepts me but only because mom threatened to divorce him if he did not accept me as his gay son. You throw the word divorce at him and he pretty much does whatever you ask him to.
So yes parents can understand their gay sons. Some parents more then others and some may be like my parents who took a while to come around but eventually they did. Some parents understand their sons but that does not mean they will accept them (maybe culture or religious reasons) which is why a lot of people hide in the closet and don't tell them. Then on the other hand we have what most people here are saying which is homophobia. If the parents are homophobic they may never understand. Hope this helps some.
|Why can't people accept parents rejecting their gay sons?|
If you didn't want to have a gay son, and your son is gay, why MUST you accept him?
If I don't want to accept him I would not.
I am 39 and my son 17 came out and don't know why should I understand his feelings when he does NOT understand MY feelings.
|Well, YOU fathered him and helped bring him up. Why decide after all this time that you suddenly don't like him because of his sexuality which really has very little to do with you any way.|